23 December 2012

Back from London

A wonderful couple of days in London... did a bunch of sight seeing, all done along the The River Thames... and had the most amazing hotel room, also overlooking The River.

While all was good as far as the trip went, I am learning somethings about myself... that make me realize that I may be best served to stay on my own.  Every time, I think I have finally got my "act together" something happens that re-awakes my past and that scared frightened little child in me comes out and destroys the day.

It's not done because of anything special, it is done because of survival.  When I am threatened that child wants to come out and protect itself as best it can.

It is sad, that child hasn't been abused in over 40 years but yet the triggers of what happen can raise its ugly head at the drop of a coin.

For my sanity and those around me... I'm just not sure what the best answer is... to run and hide or to try to explain something that I don't even understand...

No comments: