23 May 2009


This is anniversary weekend for me, so my first stop was going back to my AA homegroup. To say thanks, that I’m still sober and they’re the reason why. It was because of their friendship and support that I am still sober today.

The subject was about the desire to quit. In a group of maybe 20 people, more than half of them talked about their slips. One was just five days ago. Another said he’s been in the program for over three years and has had numerous slips, the last one was this past July.

Now my new homegroup, I know of at least one person who has slipped and yet has never mentioned it at an AA meeting. My own belief? All those people who talk so openly about their slips will eventually succeed. Why do I believe this?
They have humility, they understand that sobriety is a struggle and that they are only human. And the big key, to me, is that they are not keeping it a secret. Every meeting I go to I say, “Hi, I’m Dave and I’m an alcoholic.” There is a reason for that. I acknowledge my illness and accept it. There is no room for secrets when I do this.

These people understand that they won’t be shamed or “kicked out” of the group.
But, what I’m really starting to wonder about though - are these people who talk so freely about their slips in a better group, than those who maybe are scared to confess their “humanness?”

I was really fortunate to have a great homegroup during my early sobriety. For a group to succeed they can’t judge others rate of progression or by the amount of sobriety they have - but rather search their eyes and find the soul crying for help and support.

As I was writing this, I thought of the five people I still knew at tonight’s meeting. I’m the “baby” of the group with 13 years - between the six of us - there was over 114 years of sobriety. But they never speak about it. They talk about their “few years” in the program. And for a newcomer what a welcome site this is - not intimidated - but rather accepted.

This entry was originally posted on Thursday, August 30th, 2007

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