Creating Dreams, from the nightmares of hell...

When I first meet someone our conversation usually ends up getting around to "Well, what do you do?" I kind of chuckle trying to put everything into a couple of short sentences so I don't lose their interest. If they continue to keep this conversation alive I bring up my involvement on the Internet and my website.

Than usually, with the natural progression of questions they ask me what the name of my site is, and once again with a chuckle, I say “Creating Dreams, from the nightmares of hell.” Which is usually followed with “What?” And I repeat what I just said and try to explain to them what it means and what this site is all about.   In time, the name of the website changed but the title became my third book.

So one night, after one of these conversations, I wrote a poem about the site and its name... 


the time... this time...
could it be this is the time
the time to realize
God's dream for me

got to wonder
if after years of nightmares
my dream was past
or lost forever

is there such a thing
as a dream
after many years
filled with terror

destroying myself...
taking no prisoners
in the destruction of others
so many nightmares

years of drugs
many more years of booze
put on a pedestal
worshiped above all gods

forgot how to live
knew how to die
but in the illusion
it was easy to lie

is it a fantasy
to wish for a second chance
is that my dream
to find acceptance... forgiveness

putting the nightmares
in their rightful place
an act of faith
a search for hope

through surrender
the dreams came back
with a simple... yet powerful statement
"I'm an alcoholic"

life didn't change overnight
there's still nightmares
but now... they're fixable
all because of dreams

dreams that were found
through a Higher Power
which I knew was there
but never understood