24 February 2012

The Law of Mirrors

The Law of Mirrors says that we mirror each other in interpersonal relationships. What we dislike in others, is what we dislike in ourselves. And what we like in others, is what we like in ourselves.

By far my favorite Law. Why? It was the first Law that I understood and it was the first Law I began to practice when I quit drinking. I wanted to know why I hate such a strong hatred for some people. Hatred might seem like a strong word, yet at that time, just starting my recovery journey everything had me on edge.

I not only wanted to know why I felt the way I did with others. I needed to know. Not only to build better relationships but also to understand myself better. If I disliked someone I needed to really look closely at that relationship because by doing so I was also digging deep inside my soul.

This mirror would help me look honestly at my life, my attitudes and my behaviors. It would help me to do a self inventory and it began to change my life.

As my journey turned spiritual and I found my Higher Power this mirror began to find some compassion for those I used to dislike. It was my own mirror that I saw. Looking back on it, the compassion I felt for others was the compassion I prayed I would receive.

If you look at the Law of Mirrors, as a mirror in itself you will see it in thoughts and writings throughout time. To me, the most widely known came from Jesus Christ. When asked what was the greatest commandment, Jesus said to do unto others as you want others to do unto you.

The Law of Mirrors doesn't just talk about our dislikes but or likes as well. If someone praises you for a job well done and you like how it feels... do the same thing to someone else. Let others see what you like... watch people smile the way you smiled. Remember how you felt when you were comfortable around others and now see how people are comfortable around you.

I've always looked at this Law as the Law that my Higher Power talks directly to me through others. The actions and words of friends and enemies are the actions and words of my Higher Power. They are meant for me to reflect on my qualities, to water them and help them grow. It is also meant for me to reflect on my defects and weed them so the water can help my qualities grow.


  1. Thank you for this insightful article. It's a cocnept I am trying to learn and be more familiar with and aware especially.

  2. very helpful, as this is what I've been experiencing myself in my own life! Thank You Dave!