01 May 2011

Desperate For Love

The fifth step of CODA says, "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being, the exact nature of our wrongs."

Desperate For Love

admitting to myself was easy
admitting to God... a little harder
admitting to another human being
nearly impossible

admitting to alcoholism was easy
compared to surrendering
a human goddess
whose wish was my command

the lying... the stories
done out of love...
a sick dysfunctional need
constantly seeking your approval

until more lies were needed
to cover the lies already told
lying to others was bad enough
but it got worse

I lied to myself
my eyes didn't see
what I thought they saw
couldn't tell the truth from the lie

my heart was broken
my soul destroyed
all because of a sick need
to find love... any love

1 comment:

  1. Thoughts from "Authors Den"

    Reviewed by Barbara Henry 9/17/2009
    You are very brave;it takes courage to be honest about where we are in a particular challenge.I like your work.

    Reviewed by Michelle Mead 5/13/2008
    My brother is a recovering addict and this is the step he always has trouble with (he was clean 11 years, relapsed, has a year again), especially with the part to himself. I think you've expressed this well, indeed.

    Reviewed by Jackie (Micke) Jinks 5/9/2008
    Such expressions of admitting truths is empowering to the soul...good for you for sharing. Stay stong...

    Reviewed by Karen Palumbo 5/9/2008
    Cute photograph with the face in it, reminds me of the face on Mars that everyone says is really not there, but of course I know it really is. Words of truth, reconciling and moving on, all a part of life...