29 April 2010

De'ja Vu

De'ja Vu... awhile back I heard a description of it that has really settled in my mind. It was that a De'ja Vu moment was the universes way of letting you know that you are on the right path in your life. You are experiencing a part of your dream that is now becoming a reality.

Throughout my life I have had a few De'ja Vu moments... but not like I recently have been. I don't think I'm exaggerating when I say that anybody who ends a relationship, at times, wonders if it was the right move.

I have been on my own for over three months now and I haven't had any of those reflection type moments like I have had in past relationships because this does feel so right. And the reason for feeling this way is because of numerous De'ja Vu moments. There isn't a doubt in my mind that I am in the beginning of a wonderful journey. Where it takes me or where I go is yet to be seen but I just feel really good about it all.

Besides those De'ja Vu moments I'm getting more signs from my HP that “all is good with the world.” I've been keeping quiet about a project that is nearing the finish line. Ever since I have been in recovery I have dreamed about sharing my story through speaking engagements. Well last month a treatment center in Hot Springs, Arkansas wrote me asking about speaking at one of their events.

I told them that I would love too... but for it to happen I would need X amount of dollars to make it worth my time. They agreed. The last step will happen on May 14th when they have a board of trustees meeting and finalize the dates and agree to the financial part of it all. It is going to happen. What is awesome for me and how my HP works is that it will be taking place in September... that is the anniversary month for my sobriety.

Then two nights ago I got an e-mail from another treatment center in the State of Washington wondering about placing advertisements on my website and blog. This was something I have been thinking about doing, but that ACOA in me always talked myself out of it thinking, “Who would pay me money to place an ad on my site?” Well, my HP got tired of waiting on me to take that first step and brought them to me.

With the money I will make from this I can continue to run my website – for free. And in honesty, that is all I want... I don't want to make a lot of money... I just want to quit losing money and live a simple life – a life where I'm not owned by possessions... or jobs... or anything.

My folks would have had a fit with this notion. Why do anything if you can't make a fortune doing it? Well how about because I like doing it and it brings me peace.

Yes, my HP continues to amaze me with gifts She has given me. Gifts that I did not receive in the past... because I now realize... I wasn't following Her path. I hadn't completely surrendered to Her will.

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