Nothing
and I do mean nothing upsets me more then when a person is taken for
granted. I hate it when I see someone verbally and emotionally
abused by an ungrateful recipient. The most common people taken for
granted are nurses, doctors, and caretakers. It drives me nuts when
someone just expects that someone will take care of their needs.
Yes, a nurse and caretaker are paid to do a job, that doesn't mean
they don't deserve our respect and be grateful for everything they do
for us.
Sometimes
though caretakers do these jobs more out of love then for money. I
speak from experience. I've written in Damaged Merchandise about
being a caretaker for my ex-wife as she battled with breast cancer.
I gladly did it. “Through sickness and health.”
There
came a time though that medically the sickness ended, yet it didn't
die. There are some people for whatever reason don't want to get
better. I can understand it. Last year I got to be on a first name
basis with numerous nurses and doctors. They saw me at my worse and
they also saw me get healthy and get strong.
It was
at this point that I could return to being sick and stay the center
of attention or I could stay the course, stay healthy, and start
living life again. I was treated so wonderfully when I was sick. I
had people who would shave me, bring me meals, help me shower… they
were there for everything I needed. My wonderful girlfriend, now my
wife, waited patiently by her phone and twice a day, I would text her
asking her to call me. We'd talk for 20 minutes and by the end I was
ready to go back to sleep.
She
never complained that I was interfering in her life. Whatever she
was doing, she'd stop and take time to talk to me. It still puts a
tear in my eye. It was so beautiful and something I still cherish
and never took it for granted.
I look
back at that time and know that the best gift I gave to this
wonderful lady and to the nurses and doctors was to get better. To
not stay a victim, looking for sympathy for what happened to me.
In
reality, what happened to me was a wonderful miracle. I got to see
how much I was loved, not by people I expected but from others who
genuinely showed concern for me. And to this day, none of it has
been taken for granted.
I think
anyone who has been taken for granted can appreciate how special
people can be and how much they can help if we have the humility and
the gratitude to let it happen. It's those two traits that separate
the wonderful souls from the toxic dead beings that always want more.
When I
think of being taken for granted one story always comes right to the
front. It was over ten years ago. It was the winter and at the time
I lived in the country, there was huge snowstorm and I couldn't go to
work. So I started shoveling snow. The driveway was 40 feet long
and 20 wide, plus all the sidewalks. On a good day, I could do it in
about 45 minutes. But this day, the snow was wet, heavy, and one
foot deep. I took a couple of breaks and had it done in two and a
half hours. I went inside to warm up and was greeted with just one
question. “Did I get the mail?”
Our
mail came to a post office box that was about five blocks away. No
way was I walking down there and until just recently I couldn't even
get the car out of the garage. I really felt like whatever I did, it
wasn't enough. I had become a very codependent caretaker. My
confidence was gone and self-respect left along with it. All because
I was taken for granted.
It is a
very touchy subject to me. The gifts that are given, that are never
acknowledged, no thank you's – nothing. These same people then get
upset when the gifts stop. Where did these toxic people come from?
This
holiday season show your gratitude… don't let anyone even think
they are taken for granted. You don't need to give that special
someone an expensive gift… just let them know they are a valuable
part of your life.
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