01 December 2009

Being Vulnerable

For me the belief that being vulnerable as a way to remain healthy, has not been as strong in my life as it is right now.

For so many years, I locked up my emotions and my feelings because I didn't want to be hurt. I remained stone cold. Yes, I've had friendships and relationships, but they could only progress so far because I refused to be vulnerable. And then when those relationships ended no one ever thought much about it because I never did share any feelings or emotions.

So the only one who really was hurt in it was me. I wanted love and I wanted friendship but I was unwilling to be vulnerable so that the relationship could grow.

This last month someone very special has entered my life and they have shown me how fulfilling it is to be vulnerable. There is a level of trust that I've never felt before. I know with this person I can share my biggest fears and they won't laugh or baby me about them... but they will understand.

And as we both began to become more vulnerable... we've come to find a deep respect for each other and the boundaries we need for this friendship to grow.

This friendship started because this person opened up to me in a very vulnerable way. It was so sincere and real and something I never would have expected. After they shared with me, I allowed myself to be vulnerable by laughing. That might seem cruel, but it wasn't. My response was me being vulnerable and hoping that this person would accept me.

They did... and the rest as they say is history. Our relationship continues to evolve and change and most importantly grow because we have been vulnerable with each other.

Yes, without being vulnerable no one ever got close enough to hurt me. But by doing this I also quit growing. Every now and then people do get hurt being vulnerable... but we grow from that.

This relationship has me more in touch with my feelings and beliefs then I ever thought possible. And it all happened because I allowed myself to be vulnerable. After that came trust, respect, and yes Love.

3 comments:

Ace Merrill said...

Dave, can't wait for the completion of your trilogy. Good stuff! Drug rehab programs in LA got the goods, my man. Love it!

mike said...

thanks for the post.
Sounds like a wonderful experience for you. Go with what your gut is telling you...it souds like you are right on track!

mike said...

thanks for the post.
Sounds like a wonderful experience for you. Go with what your gut is telling you...it souds like you are right on track!